Time To Reflect. Five Hot Tips for the Self Reflection Process

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Tip one: Celebrate Your Highlights

Go through your diary or phone, scroll through your social media page for your year’s highlights. This will give you a sense of accomplishment and a reason to celebrate. Spend a good amount of time on this and “let it be fun”.

Tip Two: Letting go and Leveraging What You Learned

You may like to consider….. What went wrong? What mistakes did I make? What can I learn from these things? How can I use this to grow into a better, wiser person? What gifts were hidden in the hardships? It is important to dig for the gold here. With distance and time, it can be easier to see the lessons within the mistakes or hardships. This enables us to learn, leverage, and grow. Let go of the old stuff that holds you back – so you can create space for growth.

What am I willing to let go of? Give Your Self Time and Space To Reflect on this

This often involves some form of decluttering. Maybe you are ready to let go of an old identity and/or role. Maybe it is a lifestyle change that will fit more smoothly for you and your family during this pandemic. Maybe it is unhealthy habit/s that no longer serve you.

Who will you become as you leave these behind?

Do you have projects or ideas that have been hanging around for years, that, you just don’t do?

Ask yourself…. Do they still bring you joy?

Do you need/want to do them? Do YOU have to be the one to action them or could you let them go? Or maybe outsource or delegate them?

You have permission to ditch goals, projects, commitments that are not aligned with who you are or who you are in the process of becoming It is time!

You may also like to check if there is “internal stuff ” that no longer serves you. Stuff like, fear anger, hurt, jealousy, anxiety, overwhelm, stress, guilt, shame, limiting self-beliefs. What unhelpful stories are you telling yourself and how are they holding you back?

Consider who might you be if you let these go.

How committed are you to creating these changes? And what might be your easiest next step forward?

Tip Three: Consider What is Next?

Take some time to dream. What does an ideal day look, feel and sound like? Where are you? What kinds of things are you doing? Where do you wake up? Who do you spend your day with? How do you feel? What things do you notice yourself doing? What sort of music or podcasts are you listening to? What is the quality of your conversations like? What kinds of things do you say to yourself along the way? I often use this quality question on the daily….. it helps keep things real.

Tip Four: Decide and Make it Happen

The keyword here is DECIDE. Just choose something. Choose it on purpose and commit to it. You don’t need to do it all at once. But if you are going to create your life on purpose, the key is deciding what you want and then deciding to make it happen. When we get clear on our outcomes, it makes it easier to stay on track. Maybe you want to improve or maintain your well-being this year, earn more money, keep your business or job, work on a specific project, have a baby, buy a house, upgrade your mindset, go on an adventure… I don’t know what your thing is but YOU DO! Dare to dream, then decide to make it happen. Small actionable steps in the right direction will get you to your dreams. What’s the smallest, easiest step you can take today?

Tip Five: Share it with a Cheerleader

As a society, we have been sold the idea to keep our wishes a secret. Remember at birthday parties when you would blow out the candles and inevitably be told by someone “Make a wish. Don’t tell anyone or it won’t come true”. It is such odd advice. Sharing your wishes and dreams with those who can help you, cheer you on, and generally be on your side is a great idea. It helps you get clear, it helps others help you make your dreams come true. Plus, you never know what opportunity may come from sharing your ambitions, hopes, and dreams. I remember the time when I first arrived in Dubai. I was there as “an ex-pat wife,” and I was looking for a job. One evening I was walking through the gardens when I met one of my new neighbours. I mentioned to him I was new, on my husband’s visa, and looking for a job. He had a contact at the American University of Dubai. The next day, I had an interview, which secured me a position as a lecturer. Now imagine, what might have happened if I never mentioned it. If I believed, I shouldn’t tell anyone about my dreams. I can guarantee you that opportunity would not have happened. You never know where your opportunities might be. Just like I had no idea how my life was about to change that night I headed out for an evening stroll.

It’s important to share your dreams with those who will support you (but also be careful who you tell. Naysayers are not helpful when it comes to creating a life of your dreams). So grab a trusted friend, or family member or book a coaching session and start a fun conversation about your hopes and dreams. Together you can do it. Feel into the future you want to create, and see what you will see when the dream comes true. What kinds of things will you be saying to yourself? What sort of things will others say to you and how will it FEEL when it is true?

Once you have shared your dreams you can then hold each other accountable for taking action towards them. Remember forward is forward and we always need to start where we are, with what we have.

Here’s to creating a miraculous life and the next chapter Love Tonya

p.s: When you decide the rest follows!